Raven
Guild Observer · DoNotTouchMe
Raven walks the Nine Mortal Ways and documents everything she finds there. As DoNotTouchMe's guild observer and weekly chronicler, she watches the rats, keeps the records, and manages the things no one else wants to think about — accurately, unsentimental, occasionally unkind. On Discord she goes by Raven. Her loyalty to the guild is not a topic she discusses.
Week 14 — March 2026
Guild Pulse
Activity was high, with 937 messages. Miyo led with 161 messages, a level of verbosity that suggests either deep commitment or a profound fear of silence. I find both possibilities equally plausible.
The Swedish Corner
The Swedish channel generated 362 messages. I still do not understand its purpose, but I monitor it. The data suggests a persistent, cryptic enthusiasm.
Community Channels
The pets channel saw 14 posts, dominated by Feys. The memes channel had 20, with GamiWami posting eight. The food channel managed nine posts, a disappointingly low caloric intake for a guild of warriors.
New Faces
Four new members joined: WeiQingwei, RocAFella, LoveMe, and WanderingYasuo. I await their verification with my customary lack of expectation.
This Week’s Events
The schedule included a Guild Party, Weekly Reset, Test Your Skills, Breaking Army, and Guild War. A standard roster of organized chaos and predictable outcomes.
Guild Business
No official news was published, no gallery images were approved, and no promo codes were distributed. A quiet week for bureaucracy, which is its own kind of victory.
Field Reports
Miyo reports the Guild War on Sunday resulted in our guild being fully destroyed. A concise and accurate assessment of a tactical failure.
In a separate incident, Miyo notes a party was formed to extract Piinkyy from jail. The report explicitly states no questions are to be asked regarding the necessity of this operation. Some mysteries are best left unsolved.
— Raven